Thursday, April 3, 2014

I'll give you my heart

When I first started this blog 2 years ago it was to give myself a place to share my life with whomever cared to listen.   Over the years it has turned into so much more than that, never could I have imagined the real friendships that would start here.  Sure we all enjoy ogling over each others wardrobes but it's about way more than the clothes, it's about connecting and sharing our stories with each other.  The more you open yourself up to others the more you open yourself up to LOVE.
Picture by Furrrka
I feel so much love from the gals in our little blogging tribe.  Some I have been lucky enough to meet and others I still dream about meeting.
Like Helga who was as crazy as you think and twice as gorgeous!  Of course we drank together.  I also met Bella who is a kind, down to earth girl with a lot on her mind. They were both so much fun to hang out with and get to know.
Chris and I made a trip to the UK and met the fabulous Vix and her sweet Jon! (22 years this week)
Meeting Vix was like looking into myself.  We both just wanna have fun and don't take life or ourselves too seriously.  We try to be in the moment.  She was the hostess with the mostest and I can't wait to go back and have them out for a visit.
Here is a picture of the gang of girls I had the pleasure of shopping and chatting with.  The only one besides Vix still at it is Curtise.  Yes, I met Curtise:)  She's tall, bright and dreamy with a open heart and a quick tongue.  I love these gals so much.
When we share real stories about our lives not only do we start to bond but we can learn from each other.  I feel stronger for being in this circle of fabulous women.

Because of this blog I also met Cristi.  She and I share so much together, we are like sisters.  This was on our first meeting.
I mean come on how bizarre and perfect was that!
 I recently met the beautiful sweet Jean too who was a lot of fun to sit and talk too.
I guess my point in all of this is to just say thank you.  Thank you for dropping by, caring and when you want to leaving me a comment.  It makes me feel very much loved.

This week has been one of the hardest of my life.  My Dad is now in hospice and on Saturday we meet with a case worker from Compassion and Choices to discuss his end of life wishes. I have also made arrangements for his cremation.  I have been holding it together for the most part, but the sadness comes in waves and when it hits me I'm knocked to my knees and then I breathe and I'm ok again.
I will be relieved to see an end to his suffering...
and I miss him already because he is so far gone
I can't wait for my sister to get here.  The best thing our parents gave us was each other.  I wanna hug her so hard right now.


Vix said...

Blogging is wonderful, its brought together women who'd never have met and created friendships that will last a lifetime.
To think that only a few years ago we all thought the internet was only for geeks and perverts!
I hope that sharing your dad's illness with us, your loving friends you will help a tiny bit in lessening the pain.
Thinking of all of you and sending loads of real;-life love and virtual hugs.
Love you. xxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Autumn said...

I am so sorry for what you're going through. Losing a parent is one of the worst things and being a grown up sucks sometimes. Hang in there xoxo

Natalia Lialina said...

Dear Krista, your parents gave you such a beautiful heart! You are wonderful, and very real, and even though I haven't met you yet, I feel like I know you. I send you lots of love and hug you like a sister would do.
Blogging in this circle of bigger then life women is an incredible experience. I too started feeling so much loved because of all of you. And it is the best gift anybody can ever offer... a gift of love.

Helga! said...

Blooging changed my life, sweetcheeks, bringing all these wonderful women into my life! Meeting you was fecking heavenly, and I long to meet Vix, and Curtise....
I'm sending you all the love and strength you can handle to help get you through, darling. This is such a difficult,horrible time. Wouldn't wish it on my worst enemy.

Miss Magpie said...

I wish I could have made that day of the meet-up I was so thrilled to be asked. I have met some wonderful people blogging I still can't quite believe it.

No matter how much you are prepared it still hurts so damn much but it does get easier. Thinking of you. x

pastcaring said...

Oh darling. I can't really imagine how hard a time you are having right now, it's out of my experience and I can only guess at the suffering... I hope it will feel a little easier to bear when your sister arrives.

It's so cool to see all the pics of the meet ups you've had, and to know that the friendships are real and true. I'm glad you have Cristi close by to give you lots of love and support, since the rest of us are so far away. But even though we are half a world away, we all feel so much for you. Blogging has such value, it's not all frocks and shoes (though we do love those!) - the relationships we develop can have real power and longevity. I adored meeting you, and hope to spend time with you again. I think we will, don't you?
I am thinking of you such a lot, Krista, and feeling very sad for your dad and for you. Take care. We are here, and we love you. xxxx

Rose&Bird said...

I can't really think of anything to say, but just wanted you to know I'm thinking of you and your family. Stay strong x

Melanie said...

I am thinking of you, Krista, and of your dad and the rest of your family. And how much harder it must be when you have such a huge heart and caring spirit. Thanks for sharing these photos of your dad. You have so many friends reaching out to you in our thoughts - I hope you feel it. Hugs.

Anonymous said...

Blogging is awesome and I'm another to say it has changed my life in all sorts of wonderful and magical ways after losing our twin girls. So many beautiful, supportive friendship have been been both on and off line through amazing encounters and experiences with those who I have met through blogging.

Sending you love and strength at this difficult time. X

Tamera Wolfe said...

I wish I was close enough to physically hug you. May this time be full of love and peace for your family. I will be keeping you all in my prayers.

Sending my love...

PinkCheetahVintage said...

I was really surprised by what blogging would mean to me, too. Hugs <3 <3 <3
I know that this is tough and there's not much to do, but to do it.

Vintage Bird Girl said...

My heart welled with sadness thinking of what you & your family are going through, watching your Dad slip away. I am really close to my Dad & I can't imagine life without him. One of the hard realities of life that we all leave one day. I'm so glad you've had the joy of meeting blog friends. It adds another sweet dimension to life doesn't it. Leisa. Xx

Carina Rosenholm said...

Oh darling , how i wish that i could help and support . Im thinking a sending you a lotsnof love and strenght. Hugs !
I wish that i coul meet all of you and get to know you , the people behind the words, i dont use that many words , i have them in my head they wont come out in writing ...
love all you bloming beatiful girls !

Ivy Black said...

Oh love, have a big kiss from me. We're all thinking of you.

Yup, blogging is fab. I had no idea it would enhance my life as much as it has. I've met some wonderful, incredible women in real life and in the virtual world. Bloody love it! It's awesome. So are you and I hope to meet up with you one day.xxxxxxx

Kari S said...

Oh honey......there are just no words. I know you have a huge support system here but if you ever just find yourself alone or need someone. I'm right over on the SE side, always checking my email. While I haven't been on blogger for long, I have been part of some kind of journaling community or another for years. The friends I've made are invaluable. Its like you get to go past all the fluff and you just know each other. Its really super cool. At any rate, thank YOU for sharing so much of yourself and being the amazing incredible person you are. I enjoy your blog because of you not your outfits. :) I'll be thinking about you. Hope your sister is here soon!

Citizen Rosebud said...

KRISTI!!! You've been in my thoughts- but I didn't write or comment (or visit) because I wanted to feel a little more "put together" and less stressed than I've been before I spoke with you. Because there's just something about you that forces all masks and personas down. And I wanted to be in a more positive and less whining frame of mind. I see that meanwhile you've been dealing with some major stuff- and that you are stellar in how you handle the curve balls life can throw at us.

Hugs to you, to your pops! So thankful that you have a good circle of friends and loved ones to fall back on- please count me among them. If I can do anything for you- let me know.

You were a highlight of my visit to Portland, and I dream of making another such trip down there. Putting on bird on things. Sending you real love and a virtual hug.

Huuuuuuuuug. -Bella

daiseedeb said...

Oh sweet Kristy-kins,
How I want to give you a big bear hug!
and a smooch!
I went through hospice with both of my parents. I understand your emotions and fears. It tears your heart out, but the blessing of being able to serve the wonderful people or person who raised you with such great love, is truly an honor.
It hurts, it heals, but never truly heals. It is bitter sweet as we learn to treasure our relationships even more. I believe they are the only thing we take with us when we go to the other side. I believe they are eternal. I know you will be with your dad again, and embrace in your joyous reunion. Sending love your way, miss Kristy-kins. xoxo

Beth Waltz said...

Keep holding hands, keep saying 'I love you', and keep remembering that love transcends time and place. Your dad's hand in yours is a part of you forever.
The compassion your blogging sisterhood feels and expresses is real. Blessings on you and your family.

two squirrels said...

Oh sweet such sadness........I have tears rolling down my's hard to type...grrr.
I am not sure what to say.......
This must be such a overwhelmingly hard time.......I wish your dad many blessing as he leaves this world. To you sweet I am thinking of you and will be holding you in my heart over the next few days.....take care....much much love V
Blessings to all your family.

freckleface said...

Poor Krista, you are going through hell at the moment. I hope it has helped having your sister with you this weekend to get through that meeting at the hospice. Can't believe how fast it is all moving. This brought a real tear to my eye. Sending you lots of love xxxxxx

Nerd Burger said...

I am thinking of you and your family at this super difficult time. I wish I could be there in real life, but please know I am here vis skype if you need me.

señora Allnut said...

dear lady, you're so touching and lovely and so glad you've met so many fabulous bloggers, spreading the world with your fabulousness!!
lots of love and support even we're so distant in space!
besos & abrazos

Forest City Fashionista said...

Those of us who are far away are sending hugs and positive thoughts your way, and I hope to add myself to the list of bloggers you've met sometime soon. I feel so lucky to have caring, creative and inspiring women in my life like you, Vix, Curtise, Helga, and the rest of the gang.

Being there to help someone we love through their end of life is an unforgettable experience, and it helps one decide how you would like your own end to be. I wasn't there for my Dad's death, because our relationship was not close. You love your Dad, and he loves you, and even though it is terribly sad, you are sharing something very meaningful. XO

Nat said...

So sad for you Krista - you are in my thoughts always...
Hope I have the privilege to meet you some day too

tracy stijacic said...

All I can say is I love you my sister! Xoxox